-Inspired by the TV series on MTV-




If you really knew me, you'd know that i'm not as tough as I pretend to be. That in fact, most nights I cry myself to sleep.

If you really knew me, you'd know that I feel like my stepfather is more a father to me than my real dad.

If you really knew me, you'd know that my stepfather has been in the remand centre for almost a year now… And that i've seen him once during this time, and I miss him every day.

If you really knew me, you'd know that I'd give anything to hear my mum say she's proud of me.

If you really knew me, you'd know that I fall in love easily, but I find it hard to trust anyone.

If you really knew me, you'd know that when I look in the mirror, I see the person I am inside… And I don't like it. I don't see why anyone would ever want me, and I don't blame them when they leave me.

If you really knew me, you'd know that I have depression and anxiety disorder, and I haven't been on medication because my mum thinks i'm faking it.

If you really knew me, you'd know that i'm joining the defence force next year. And I continually get abuse about it from my 'friends.' They tell me that it's people like me that wars still exist and happen around the world. But it's people like me that die around the globe every day for people like them.

If you really knew me, you'd know that my biggest dream, is to be a jet fighter pilot… But i'm not smart enough to be anything but a soldier.

If you really knew me, you'd know that I wish I had someone to hold me at night while I slept.

If you really knew me, you'd know that i've been in love with my best friend for three years, he knows, but i'm like a sister to him. I may have other relationships, and I think he secretly hates me.

If  you really knew me, you'd know that I think my life is a joke. A cruel, nasty joke… And even though I know that there are people worse off than I am, I still suffer and I hate when people tell me that.

If you really knew me, you'd know that I wish I had the guts to go out and have fun with my friends at 2am at night without my mum's permission. But I care too much that she'll worry.

If you really knew me, you'd know that I wish I could find someone that loves me for all my quirks and annoyances…

And if you really knew me, you'd know that I have lots of friends, you could even call me popular… But if you really knew me, you'd know that in a group of my friends, I feel lonley and that I can't trust any one of them.

I challenge you all to do this. Now. Share the love… And don't hide the pain <3